LGBTQ x Fertility: How Amilis is Bridging the Gap

Chloe x Amilis: Removing the taboo on fertility in the LGBTQ community 

Chloe Dall'olio is no stranger on the internet. She’s an LGBTQ artist and content creator. A fierce advocate for the queer communities rights, she’s currently navigating the intersection of being a part of the community, wanting to feel safe and exploring her fertility. No biggie. 

With Amilis, Chloe shared her journey up until the big decision to take her fertility test. And she was honest about how complicated fertility is as a topic in the LGBTQ community.

Chloe on being “in the closet” about fertility

“It's quite funny” she says, “I've been in the closet about fertility for so long now”. Plus, you know the phrase, “You can’t be what you don’t see.” Chloe didn’t know anyone in London who was queer and had started a family–making it hard to imagine it for herself. 

For Chloe, fertility feels like a taboo topic in the LGBTQ community. “I haven’t googled about it, or have spoken to anyone about this topic” she says. 

And why, you ask?

“I had even been scared up until now to look around for information” Chloe says “because there's just so many types of information out there, which can overwhelm people”.

And  in her community? People and artists are fighting for their rights. They’re focused on safety–not having kids. Starting a family is seen as a luxury after all that.. 

“There are so many ways to build a family, and I want to hear from more queer people about their choices (or lack thereof) around these deeply personal and vulnerable topics” says Chloe.

Bridging the fertility gap in the LGBTQ space

77% of LGBTQ+ millennials are either already parents or are considering having children. Yet, 40% of those who had children faced barriers when starting their family. 

There are more stats by the way. Only 5% of eligible transgender youth use fertility preservation services before beginning hormone therapy.

So, what do these stats mean? It seems like there’s a major demand in the LGBTQ+ community for family-building resources, including fertility treatments. However, there still remains a huge gap in terms of access and awareness.

In fact, to hear it from the people themselves, Chloe teamed up with the team at Amilis and headed to London Pride 2024 on a mission to gauge the community's vibe on fertility themes to better advocate for LGBTQIA+ individuals in the fertility space.

🏳️‍🌈A note from Amilis: Chloe joined us to help us inform our inclusivity strategy and guide us to be better allies to the LGBTQIA+ community! We celebrated at Pride in London, but most importantly, we aimed to break the stigma and spark conversations about family planning and fertility. Watch it here!  [Link to reel/Tiktok]

Also read: Our LGBTQ guide to egg freezing

To be or not to be a queer mom

“You know how people say they are a cat person or a dog person” she says, “ I believe I’m a baby person”. 

Underneath it all, Chloe knew that she wanted a baby and she was no longer afraid to admit it, even outside the more heteronormative circles like the office or among school friends who had embraced traditional ways of starting a family. 

In fact, it was also her initial thoughts and fears that paved the way for her to realise that she doesn’t have to be ashamed to want to be a mother, even if she is in a queer relationship or in the LGBTQ community. 

“Just like how having a career and being a mother can coexist” she says, “ for me specifically, being a mother, having a career and being in a queercareer relationship can coexist because it’s all about love and acceptance at the end of the day”.

“Having the choice of becoming a mother, and having the right information to make an informed decision is really important” she emphasises and adds “You don’t have to feel bad if you want a child”.

A journey filled with questions

“To be or not to be a queer Mom”

“Can I get pregnant even with PCOS?”

“Will I even be a mother one day?”

These were some of the questions that echoed in Chloe’s head. Adding to that, she also had this fear of whether PCOS and her age would be a barrier for her, on her journey of pregnancy.

She saw her friends of the same age having their second, or third child which made her wonder where she was headed in this journey.

And these very concerns and questions ended up being the trigger that made Chloe want to explore testing her fertility. She realised that she had to work on her fears and move forward with them, instead of running away from them. 

One, she had to tackle them head-on by gathering as much information as possible. And two, she also realised that she had to know her options as well as not enough people in her community talk about it. 

That’s when Amilis came into the picture. 

“I then decided to seek help from Amilis” she says, “who know what they're talking about and deal with people like me with the exact same fears about their fertility – to ultimately help me understand my fertility, understand my options, decide if I wanna do something about it, and if I do, guide me through next steps”.

Fertility testing and egg freezing as an option

Chloe came across Amillis at a point when she hadn’t even googled about fertility or even talked to anyone about it. 

But when she came across Dana and Sarita, she felt a sense of trust and felt like she wanted to put the first steps in their hands.

They simplified it down for her, and explained how a fertility test can be the first step.

“Not many people actually know you can even test this... the GPs are definitely not talking about it!” Chloe says. 

Chloe opted for an AMH test, which helped her understand how many eggs she has compared to others for age. The AMH test also helps detect PCOS or menopause, helping Chloe check if her egg count aligns with her PCOS diagnosis. 

Since she went through Amilis, she also received a personalised report, that indicated her levels, and the average AMH levels for her age. 

And as per her report, she had a number that was “optimal” for her age. While hearing this or seeing this made her feel good, she was convinced to go ahead and understand what was next for her.

As someone who hadn’t navigated the fertility space, she also mentions how Amilis holds your hand throughout the process, and when you find out about your fertility, or want to opt for egg freezing, they put you in touch with the right clinic. 

And ultimately, she figured it didn’t have to be as overwhelming as she thought.

“I'm beginning to open up about where I stand and what my possibilities are. From here, we'll see where the journey takes us” she says. “The topic is vast—you don't need to be a biological mother to start a family, and family isn't limited to biology. Queer and chosen families are some of the most beautiful forms of family”

And as for what’s next for Chloe… tune into her social channels to follow her journey.

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